A Day in the Life

Homeschooling and Medieval Living

What We Won’t Touch

on January 15, 2013

From the Daily compass:

What we are reluctant to touch often seems the very fabric of our salvation.”
― Don DeLillo

Who are you reluctant to contact or acknowledge? How might they be an agent of your salvation?

OK, I can really see how the Daily Compass goes with the CLF. It all revolves around a theme. This month it is salvation. I wrote on this a bit yesterday. I am a member of the Society for Creative Anachronism. It is a medieval re-creation group. I am a youth officer for the Kingdom of Ansteorra. I think I have been avoiding my friends in the SCA. I did not realize this at first. But I really have. I feel guilty that I do not have the gas/money/transportation to attend meetings. I feel horrible and disappointed that I cannot make the meetings/get-togethers. I really miss them so much. I avoid them because it hurts too much. But I really do need to contact them. They need to know what is going on. I think that if I just talk to them, it will begin a healing process that I really need right now. I need to get what I can done and ask for help with the rest. I have really been shirking my duties as a Kingdom officer. I don’t attend events and I have not done much work. I really need to talk to my Kingdom seneschal and let him know what is going on. I can alleviate many of my problems if I just ask for help. It is so hard to do that though. It makes me feel weak. I try to be as strong as I can. I get so frustrated that I can’t do everything. That feeling makes me depressed. Then, I get nothing done. It is a vicious cycle. So, I need to stop being upset and do something about it. Today, I will email/call everyone I need to in order to get back on track and get my work done. There is an event coming up called Round Table. It is a semi-annual kingdom-wide officer meeting. I was going to go. Now, it looks like I won’t be able to attend after all. I was so looking forward to it. I just can’t find a way to make it there. So, I will find someone who can go for me. I have not missed a single one since I took office. I teach a class and have a forum discussion. The last class had one participant. It was awful. So, maybe it won’t be a bad thing for me to miss it. I don’t know. I will just see. I will talk to an SCA friend of mine and see what she thinks. She always speaks her mind and gives great advice. I have my salvation in sight. I can feel the tension starting to fade already. It helps to get a game plan together. I look forward to the healing with anticipation and gratitude.

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