I have always loved journaling ever since high school. I will never forget Mrs. Romano, my Creative Writing teacher. Our homework in the class was to keep a daily journal. There were times when it was my best friend and others when I dreaded the assignment. I have tried many blogs and I have quit them all. I think there are two main things that keep me from staying up with it. First, I let life get in the way to often. Two, I am always afraid that someone will read it and judge me. I hate conflict and I really hate being judged. I should not care what others think, but I do. I wear my heart on my sleeve and I hurt easy. I have tried to toughen up but it is very difficult. This is my effort to toughen up. I am starting this journal on MS Word to begin with. If I can keep it up for more than a couple of weeks, then I will start yet another blog. It is very important for me to have a journal of some sort. I start one on paper then I lose the paper. I start it in a journal book and I lose it. Then I am afraid that my family will read it. So, here is my blog online so everyone can read it. It makes no sense. Oh well.
I have also started another new thing today. I visited the online community for the UUA at www.questformeaning.org. It really got me to thinking. I used to be a member of First Jefferson UU Church. I loved it. I really miss it. I wish I could attend but I live over an hour away from it now. I also do not have the gas to visit there. So, I am now looking into the online community. Through that community, I also found a site called the Daily Compass. It is great. It reminds me of the Baptist “My Daily Bread”. The Daily Compass is a daily blog with a passage and a question. It is designed to really get you thinking. I figured it would give me something to write about. It looks like I found something without using it. But, I like the question anyway. So, I will include it here.
The passage from one year into the next is really no different than the passage from one day to another, except in our minds. But in our minds is where all possibilities of change and growth begin.
What new thing do you imagine for yourself this year?
I would really love to spend more time doing the things that matter to me. Right now, I work outside the home. I work Monday through Friday. I leave the house at 10 am and I get home around six in the evening. Now this doesn’t seem so bad. But, there is a problem in this. I homeschool my children and I am an officer in the Society for Creative Anachronism. Both are a dear passion of mine. But I cannot indulge in those passions because my work takes way too much out of me. I am off today and I will spend the day doing all the things that have needed my attention way to long. I will clean house, catch up on email, write a report (for my SCA officer position), and get other SCA loose ends tidied. This will probably take the entire day. After which, I will be off to bed. As soon as I get home in the evening, I am tired from driving all day (did I mention that I am a courier who drives over 1000 miles a week?) and want nothing more than to eat and go to bed. I rarely spend time with my family. The good news is that I am allowed to take them with me. I only have room for one other person, so we rotate who goes with me. The kids loved it at first. Now, they really don’t like going. But, it is the only time I get to spend with them.
Anyway…I really want to solve this problem. I feel the best solution is for my husband to work and allow me to stay at home. Right now, he is going to college. He gets no support from my family in this. No one in my family (except me) ever attended college. My mom married two months after graduating high school. My dad always puts my husband down because he feels that he should be out there working. “College won’t get him anything but a stupid piece of paper and no job,” my dad says. And sometimes, he really convinces me. I see so many college graduates who are working at McDonald’s and Wal-Mart. I see people with a BS in Computer Science who become construction workers because there is no work in the CS field (or it is just so flooded with applicants). So, what do I tell my family? And it does not help that my husband doesn’t complete his work. He went from Phi Theta Kappa (honor society) to scholastic probation.
So this is a bit more than I really intended to write. I guess I really need journaling after all. There is so much I want to say that my blog entry seems very disjointed. I guess I will really have to work on that.
Well, this is where I must leave for now. I will be back tomorrow with another Daily Compass assignment.
A Day in the Life 
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